Hey, my friend! What is up? And welcome back to Do Life Big! I am psyched to have you here again. Thanks for tuning in. Today is going to be an awesome episode for you; it's going to be short. And it's going to be to the point. And in case you missed it and haven't already done so, make sure you go to kathireuter.com/thinkthisnotthat. I will put this in the show notes for you. But I created a completely free guide to help you turn around your negative thoughts or limiting beliefs that you have in your mind. And those are the thoughts that kind of keep you stuck there, those things that you know, when you go to do something, you think, “Hey, I just don't think I have what it takes or who am I to have this kind of success or you know, I'm a newbie, I don't think I could figure this out. I don't think I have what it takes.” And instead of thinking those thoughts, I give you an alternative, empowering thought that you can put in place of that. And that is how you start to reprogram the way that you think so that you can build that successful business, build that successful life and really just live the life that you want to live. So excited about everything, knowing that you're going in the right direction. And that's really the only difference between people who stay where they are and people who are growing and are seeing the success that they want and are just truly filled with enthusiasm and excitement all the time when you talk to them about their business or life. So make sure you go and you snag that. Download it. Print it out. Keep it on your hand. You will definitely be needing it.
Okay, so let's dive into today's episode. So I wanted to spend today talking to you about a coaching session that I had with one of my students the other day. I had a one-on-one coaching session with one of my students from my program, The Mindset Accelerator. And I just thought it was really interesting; I thought it was extremely relatable, the things that she was sharing with me about her business, and she was talking about how she loves her business. She believes in her business. She believes in all of it; it has helped her and her family out tremendously. She's a full-time nurse with a little three-year-old at home, and she's building a business on the side. And she's doing extremely well with it. And she knows that this business can change so many lives and can help so many other people. But she was saying how there was this one part of the business where it came to talking one on one to people that just made her nervous. So she was avoiding it. And she knows the importance of doing that. And she knows that she has to do it. But she just was kind of feeling stuck in this place. The reason why she was staying stuck in this place and was avoiding doing that, was because she was thinking about what would happen if somebody didn't agree with what she was doing. Or what would happen if somebody said something negative to her? What would people think about her if she reached out and talked to them about her business that she had?
First of all, I want to say that this is completely normal. If you are an entrepreneur, there are so many things that are going to happen that are going to make you feel nervous, right? It is completely normal to feel a little bit intimidated sometimes and want to almost avoid it and not do it. But guess what? Those things that you're nervous about, those things that you're a little bit intimidated about. Those are the things that are going to grow you. And usually, it is those things in your business or in your life you want to apply it to your life that make you intimidated and worried and a little bit nervous, a little bit of butterflies in your stomach. Those are the things that are going to actually grow you the most or help you grow your business to the next level the most. You're not alone if you feel this way. And there are certain things in your business that you avoid because you get worried about them. You're not alone; that's totally normal. The only difference between you and someone who is where you want to be is that they've got an extremely good at knowing that it's part of the journey. Understanding that doing that thing that makes them nervous is going to grow them, and they're not going to be perfect in the process; they're going to get better with time. But guess what? They do it anyway.
And so for myself personally, if I feel worried, not even so much worried, but if I feel like nervous, and I get that feeling in my stomach, you know, butterflies like, oh my gosh, this is really making me nervous, you know, I'm kind of worried about this; I don't know, I have trained myself to run toward that and to do it anyway. Because the thing is, every time you're presented with something new that makes you nervous and almost threatens you, your brain wants to keep you safe right where you are doing the same thing. And so it will try to get you to stay right where you are not taking that action. But I've been nervous plenty of times, and I've forced myself to do it anyway. I have been nervous when I've had to do big presentations. I was nervous when I decided to book a trip, to go on a business trip completely alone to Arizona to a huge event that I knew no one that. I did it anyway. I get nervous when I am getting interviewed on somebody else's podcast that makes me nervous. But guess what? I do it anyway. And every time that you do it, you will end up growing and being able to get to the next level; something good will come out of it. Every time that I did a big call or a big live training call for entrepreneurs. I've always gotten messages, positive messages thanking me for helping them see a new perspective for changing their life, for impacting them, for inspiring them, for motivating them. When I went to that trip all by myself, that business event, and I didn't know anybody there, guess what came out of that a whole new group of friendships, a whole new group of other women who I met, who are also podcasters. That was awesome, right? And you're able to make all these new connections, and you're able to grow and get to the next level.
Here's the thing that I want you to keep in mind: when you do encounter this type of scenario in your business or in your life where, “Oh, I'm a little nervous, I don't really know if I want to do this.” You have to understand that the reason why you're nervous, the only reason why you're nervous, and you're worried, and you're trying to avoid it is because you've created a negative story or negative outcome for that action that you're about to take that you haven't even taken yet. Like you have chosen to avoid doing that thing in your business that you know is the thing that's going to actually grow your income and impact more people. But you've chosen to ignore that and kind of stay right where you are. Because you've created this story that well, if I do this, someone's going to tell me that they think that I'm salesy, or if I do this, someone's going to say something negative to me. Or if I actually post this, then maybe I might get a negative comment, or I'm going to get some haters, right? You've created this negative outcome for something that you haven't even done yet. You don't know for certain what's going to happen. But you've just spent all this time and energy and have wasted all this time and energy, in your mind, creating a negative outcome for something that you haven't even done yet. We all can do this. And here's the difference between you and the person who is continuing to see that growth that I know you want to see in your business and in your life. The only difference is that, that person has chosen to create a positive story, a positive outcome for the action that they haven't taken yet, instead of looking at it like, well, if I do this one piece, then I'm gonna get a hater, or someone's gonna say something negative, or someone's gonna think that I don't know what I'm talking about, instead of wasting your time creating a negative story, well, you might as well waste your time creating a positive story. You might as well sit there and say, I know that if I run this training call for these 350 people, I know that I'm going to impact someone in a positive way, and it's going to change somebody's life; I know that it's going to help someone I know that someone's going to benefit from this. Who can I help today? Who can I impact today? Who needs to hear from me right now? Who needs this in their life? And it's that constant decision and that constant shift as you go through your business and as you go through life where every time you're presented with that uncomfortable moment, or that uncomfortable action that you know, you need to take of just not listening to what could happen negative, right? But instead creating a positive outcome for it and focusing on that. Because guess what? It's inevitable, right? There are going to always be haters there, there are going to be people who don't agree with what you're doing. Not everybody needs to like what you're doing. Not everybody needs to agree with what you're doing. Not everybody needs to do what you're doing and guess what? That's okay. That is okay. Because everybody has their own life. Everyone has their own choices. You have your own life. You have your own choices, but guess what? There are a boatload of people out there who need you and who need to hear from you. You need to be living your best life. You want to Do Life Big you have to run toward that feeling of nervousness. The butterflies in your stomach when I get that feeling, I know that that is my green light to go, that you better do it, do not avoid it. Like I almost canceled that trip, that business trip that I went on alone. I almost did. But then I remembered, Kathi, don't do this. Every time that you force yourself to do it, you grow, and you get to the next level.
Growing is fun. It's no fun when you're just plateaued. And you're just going through the motions, doing all the things that make you comfortable on autopilot. It's fun when you're growing. It's exciting, and you have a different kind of energy about you. So start there, start with really just identifying, “Hey, what's that area in my business or in my life, that when I think about makes me a little nervous, it gives me the butterflies and I've been avoiding it?” But I know deep down that I know I need to just do it. But I've been putting it on the back burner. And I've been doing other things instead. Because I've been creating that negative outcome for something that I haven't even done yet.
What is that thing for you? And I am challenging you to just go toward it anyway. And when you're thinking about, “Oh, all right, I'm gonna take this action, I'm gonna go this direction here, I'm gonna do it anyway.” Don't even let your mind get wrapped up in some kind of negative outcome that could happen. Don't even let your mind go there. Immediately, take control of your thoughts, and shift it to what good could come of this. If I did come out of my comfort zone here and do this thing. Who could I help? What lives could be impacted? What lives could be changed? Look at it that way. And always focus on how you can help and serve other people versus what's going to go wrong and how's that going to make me feel?
It's kind of like if you owned a restaurant, you wouldn't not go around and tell people that you owned a restaurant, right? You'd be like, “Hey, when are we going to go back and eat at my restaurant? Hey, did you check it out? Hey, did you try the new meal? Hey, did you see that now we're open late night? Hey, did you see that now we offer brunch? Hey, did you check out we have a new cheesecake flavor,” or you will be telling everybody about it; you wouldn't hide that and keep that to yourself, and it's the same thing with any kind of business that you run.
People need to know about you. People need to hear from you. And you need to be excited about it. And you need to have that energy around it. And you didn't know that what you have is going to help other people; you're doing a disservice to people by not telling people about what you have, and what you offer, and how you can help them. It's not our job to keep what we're doing to ourselves. It's not our job to make the decision for other people with whether or not they want to be a part of this or not. It's our job to tell them about it. And let the decision be up to them whether or not they feel that it's a good fit for them or not or they're interested in it or not. And maybe they're going to love it. And maybe they won't. Either way, it's okay. It's okay. You are going to gain so much more confidence the more that you do this, and you come out of your comfort zone like this.
If you're in a phase of your business right now, or your life where you never get that butterfly moment, you never feel a little anxious, a little nervous, then you're just plateaued. You're not growing; it's impossible. You should be feeling that feeling as often as possible. And it can just be slight little things like if you're not a business owner, maybe you're someone who avoids going out and social gatherings because you get social anxiety so you just don't do it. And guess what? Now you've decided that you are going to attend that big brunch on Sunday with a group of the moms from your child's school, and you've never done it before. Things like that. Things like that will help you grow into the person who you're really meant to become, and it makes all the difference. You never want to go through this phase of your life where you're just going through the motions, hamster on a wheel, day in, day out, never doing anything out of your comfort zone. Because we want growth, we want to grow; we want to make as much of an impact as possible. You want to live up to your best potential. We want to Do Life Big and that means paying attention to how you feel and doing it anyway.
If I can give you any piece of advice here, the only difference between where you are now and where you want to go. The only difference between you and that person who is already there who you look up to. The only difference is that they chose to do it anyway. They don't let their negative thoughts get in their way. They don't let any kind of limiting beliefs stop them. They don't let what anybody else says to them, or think of them stop them like they are going, and they understand that it's all just a part of the journey. They understand that there are going to be people who don't like what they do, there are gonna be people who don't like you. And that's okay. Because you gotta be you. Right? You don't want to be playing. You don't want to be boring. You just want to be you. So you can attract more people to you. That's everything.
So just to recap here, it's normal to feel nervous, and to get a little intimidated in your business, and want to avoid doing certain things. But understand that it's all part of the process. All entrepreneurs go through it. But they choose to do it anyway. Because they understand that on the other side of that nervousness is growth, they understand that if they do it anyway, they're going to come out a different person, a better person, more growth, and they'll always be something, right? The next thing is to make sure that you focus on creating a positive outcome for that action that you're going to take. Don't get in your own head and get all hung up and creating negative stories of what's going to happen if you do it. That's what's keeping you stuck where you are. Turn it into a positive story. Who can you impact? Who can you help? Who's going to benefit from this? Who needs you? There's someone out there who need you, and focus on that, and do it anyway. And just know your confidence is going to grow and when you become more confident, you're going to become more competent and you're going to get more energy, and energy is everything.
All right. So I hope today's episode helped you out. Thanks so much for tuning in. Thanks for listening. You know, I love you, you know, I think that you rock, and I can't wait to see you the next time. Alright, bye.
